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And stranger still to know the precise moment when said event occurs. You are going along, business as usual when it creeps in on you like the afternoon tide. Things seem okay, then they get a little dangerous and before you know it, you’re out to sea with nowhere to go or hide. The only course of action is to swim hard forever or to smash against the rocks, hoping you are quickly lost. What does one do when there is nothing left to do? Where do you begin when you have no idea where you are? All that you know is that everything is a failure, every part of you is a loss, and emptiness takes on a whole new meaning. Times like these are beyond depression and the horrid suicide. Rock bottom is when there are no emotions, nothing left, nothing at all. There is no reasoning, and it takes reasoning to die. You do have choices. You can lay silent with your mind racing, racing to the tune of regrets, doubts, fears, failures, and never agains, never wills. Or you can pick yourself up slowly. I’m the only one she shows her nasty side to so I’m the only person who sees her for the mean-spirited and dark-hearted woman she really is. Watching Bernice in action reminded me of how wicked women could be, seemingly for no reason at all. Hate to sound like a hater but the truth must be told. Men aren’t saints. We do our share of damage in this world. But there’s always a reason behind what we do and why we do it. Not always a good reason or even a smart one, but there’s a reason nonetheless. The reverse isn’t true with women. Especially the black gals I seem to meet. They hate us black men with a fiery passion. What gives? I wasn’t in the best of moods when Marybeth came calling. Nevertheless, I put on a smile and asked her how she was doing. Marybeth stood there, and we talked for a moment. She told me that she’d recently switched her major from nursing to social work. When I asked her what brought this change about, she had the most amazing story to share with me. She told me.
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